Who Should File First For Divorce? Does it Matter?

Taking the First Step: Exploring the Significance and Considerations of Filing for Divorce

The decision to file for divorce is not one that’s made lightly. A pressing concern many have before they file, though, is whether they should go ahead and file or they should wait for their spouse to do it. In many cases, it may not make much of a difference. However, there are some situations in which it can make a difference, and that difference can be enough to sway the divorce. It’s crucial to consider the timing of filing for divorce and who should file carefully before making any decision.

Initiating the Process

Initiating the divorce process may make a difference by giving the person a little more control over the first steps. Though this may not be a big deal in the end, it does give them the opportunity to decide when the divorce is filed if they are interested in making sure it proceeds quickly or if they have something that needs to be addressed right away.

Filing first can make a bigger difference in cases where the element of surprise can give the filing spouse an advantage over a spouse who may try to hide assets or otherwise impact the case through deception. Talking to a divorce attorney in Cullman can help determine if filing first is a good idea and, if so, when to file to take advantage of the element of surprise.

Financial Considerations

When a divorce is contentious, it may not be easy for one spouse to get documents from the other. The filing spouse may be able to time the divorce so they can access all documents that are needed for it, such as bank account statements, copies of wills, life insurance policies, and more. Having these documents before filing can help prevent changes during the divorce process or highlight changes that do occur and that can impact the divorce. Being first also allows the filing spouse to make sure they are financially stable before the process begins, preventing issues if bank accounts are cleared out or closed.

Standing Order Can be Requested

When there is a concern that a spouse will make significant asset changes, such as selling a property, draining a bank account, or hiding any assets, it is important to move fast and request a standing order from the court. A standing order prevents anything significant from changing until the divorce is complete so that it’s more difficult to hide assets or to take away funds needed for the filing spouse to pay bills and cover necessary expenses. This can be needed in any type of divorce, but it’s especially important if the filing spouse has not worked or does not make as much money.

Psychological Impact

Divorce typically invokes strong feelings in the couple, so it’s no surprise that filing first can have an impact, too. The filing spouse may feel more in control or empowered by taking the first step to end the marriage, and this can help get them through the process. The other spouse, however, may have strong emotions after being served divorce papers, especially if they were not expecting to be served or are unhappy with anything included in the documents.

Impact on Children

It is common for divorce to have an impact on children of any age, including adult children. This does depend on the reason for the divorce, whether it’s amicable or contentious, and how everything plays out during the divorce process. It can also depend on who files for divorce first. In some situations, children may see the filing spouse as the person ending the marriage and may blame them for the breakup. In others, though, the children may be proud of the filing spouse for taking the first step, depending on why the marriage is ending. Communicating with the children using age-appropriate explanations can help minimize the impact of who files first on the way they see their parents.

Are There Disadvantages to Filing First?

While filing first can be advantageous in some situations, it can have negative consequences, too. It is important for the spouse to determine the extent of the negative consequences before filing first and determine if it may be better to have the other person file. Some of the disadvantages include the following.

• Cost of the Divorce. The person who files will typically pay any filing fees as well as the cost to serve their spouse with the divorce papers. Though this can end up being a small percentage of the overall cost of the divorce, especially for drawn-out cases or ones where there is a lot of fighting, it is something to consider.
• Heightened Conflict. The person being served divorce papers may be angry, and it may cause more conflict during the divorce process. This doesn’t happen in every case, and if the couple is able to work together through the divorce, who files first may not make as much of a difference.
• Asking for Too Much or Too Little. In the initial paperwork, the filing spouse will ask for what they want out of the divorce. If the filing spouse asks for too much, the other spouse may overreact or refuse to negotiate. If they ask for too little, they may give up assets the other spouse was willing to split and will have less room for negotiation.

The divorce process varies based on the reason for the marriage to end, the ability of the spouses to get along, and a lot more. It can also be impacted by who files the paperwork first, so it’s important to never make this decision lightly. Filing first can be a good idea, but there are times when it’s not recommended because of the impact it can have. Someone who is interested in filing for divorce from their spouse will want to speak with a lawyer about the situation before making any decisions. A lawyer can help determine if it’s advantageous to go ahead and file or if it might be better to wait and see if the other spouse files first.